Five Active Listening Strategies
"Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply." - Dr. Stephen R. Covey
When was the last time you listened? Like really listened. Without interrupting, planning your next words, or thinking about something else? TRULY listening means you can learn new things, understand other’s points of view (without yours getting in the way), and find cohesiveness to make a really good team even better.
Have I mentioned that really listening can also be really hard? Ask your friends, spouse, or partner if you ever blank out in the middle of a conversation? Have you ever interrupted a colleague to tell them your experience or your point of view?
I had a “listening” experience with my oldest daughter last week. We were working on math homework after school. She completed the worksheet on her own and then I checked it, noticing a few items that were wrong. We got into a bit of “discussion” about how she arrived at her answer. She was trying to explain to me how the teacher taught it and I was using my “old mom” math skills. We couldn't get to common ground so I decided to use a different approach. I had her re-write the problem on another piece of paper and had her teach it to me as the teacher did for her. I listened, asked questions about the problem, and let her explain how she understood it. Not only did I learn math her way, but she solved the problem on her own after working through it again. I also realized how much she is capable of and how much she has grown in the first eight weeks of school.
So how does this apply in the workplace? The answer is everywhere. Listening and communicating is REQUIRED every time you have a project, need to problem solve, perform corrective actions, onboard new customers, and develop your employees.
Here are five tips for being an awesome listener.
Remove distractions: move to a place that works well for conversation, put your phones and/or laptops away, sit facing the person you are talking to, and maintain eye contact.
Use reflective language to make sure you are understating what the person is saying. For example; “What I’m hearing is” or “So you are frustrated because”. You can even do a role-playing activity to practice.
Ask questions to gain more information about the topic of conversation.
Encourage the other person to explain the topic or point of view in a different way. Everyone learns differently and can benefit from different words, drawings or metaphors to better understand.
Only give your opinion or experiences if asked. Speak honestly and use fact-based information rather than emotions.
KLO offers one-on-one and team coaching sessions to improve your employee’s communication skills. We also facilitate 7 Habits for Highly Effective Managers, which has an entire section (Habit 5 - Seek First To Understand) dedicated to listening and understanding others. Contact Kristin to discuss your needs and for more information on the training and development programs offered.